Tim Dowling: my sisters are home alone

My siblings’ visit reminds me how tricky Britain can be for Americans – particularly our house, with its incontinent dog, tricky loo and sticky front door lock

My sisters are visiting from the US. One has arrived ahead of the other, and I’ve left her in charge because I have to be away for one night.

Before I go I give her a thorough briefing: which key opens what, how to work the coffee machine. I walk her to the tube station where my second sister will arrive the next morning, and then walk her back, testing her on the names of the streets.