‘We are trying for a baby, but how do we navigate becoming parents if we struggle with monogamy?’ | Leading questions

‘We are trying for a baby, but how do we navigate becoming parents if we struggle with monogamy?’ | Leading questions

The things we look for in a romantic or sexual partner, says Eleanor Gordon-Smith, often aren’t the things we look for in a co-parent.

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My partner has recently come to me in significant emotional distress with a reinvigorated want to open our relationship as he feels he needs more “love”. We are actively trying for a child after a few years of infertility and this new [wish] is not doing anything for the stability of our relationship. How do we navigate becoming parents if we struggle with monogamy?

Eleanor says: One of the weird things about 21st century love is the way we select partners first for dating and sexual attraction, and then segue those relationships into partnerships of parenting and household. These are very different kinds of relationships to have with another person. The things we look for in a romantic or sexual partner often aren’t the things we look for in a co-parent.

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